Monday, July 03, 2006

Can We Love From Afar?

Q: I have a question regarding a person in my life I believe is my true soul mate. We met nearly 2 years ago and our connection was more complete than either of us had experienced before. I have never been married, am the mother of a 14 year old son. When we met he was going thru a very nasty divorce. We were together and then for reasons due to his employment, he is a consultant, we have been apart. He is in Hyderabad since 10/04. We have kept in touch via email and have seen each other twice since he left. We both feel as if we are soul mates and openly share these emotions but I desire so much for him to be back in my life in a physical presence. I guess I am wondering how does one sustain loving so much from so far away and why did it happen to begin with? Any insight would be greatly appreciated.

A: Thank you so much for your question!

Actually, your question is quite common. How do you sustain a relationship from afar and why did it happen in the first place?

I believe that this person who came into your life did so for a very important reason. The vibes are there...everything seems to be in synch, so why is it that he cannot be in my life physically and how do I get through this without losing my everloving mind?

Well, the secret is this. You and this man have touched on a spiritual level. You've already made physical contact, and that's a good start because the instant you meet is when you feel the spiritual connection. If it's not there at the beginning, it's not the true soul mate bond.

So, let's just say that the spiritual connection is in place. What do you do now?

The best advice I can give you is not to obsess.

Get involved in things you like to do or you're going to get yourself into a state that is not compatible with the soul mate experience. In other words, be happy within your present life.

By not obsessing over this, you'll accomplish two things.

One, you'll be doing something productive and this can only be positive towards your self-fulfillment, happiness and self-growth (no matter how old you are, you're still growing mentally).

And two, the soul mate in question will look to you in better light. Sure, he probably knows that he's missed, as you and he are on that same spiritual realm, but he will see a strong woman; a woman who can withstand being apart from him.

What will happen is that his psyche is going to do two things.

He's going to see you as someone who can withstand the pressures of life and can hold up her own end when faced with a challenge.

And, two, he's going to try even harder to find a way to be with you because he's not the subject of ALL your interests as you have become a productive, busy and happy woman.

See how that works?

Now, in time, if it's meant to be, it will happen. If everything is in place, both your and his psyches are in the right frame of mind and both of you are leading productive and happy lives on each of your ends, only positive results can occur.

However, if it does not happen, you have to look at why it is that caused the block. Is it out of your hands? Can he not come home because he is employed so far away and it's not possible?

Or, does the spiritual connection exist over time and space and bring two lovers who are meant to be in each other's lives together?

I'd love for you to keep in contact with me as I'd love to see what happens over time.

Hope this helps and if you have anymore questions, please feel free to ask. ;o)

Love and Light, Dorothy


Dorothy ThompsonAuthor, Syndicated Relationship Columnist, Soul Mate Relationship Coach


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